Tom of course is a minor legend in sword-and-sorcery circles, perhaps best known for his illustrations of Zebra paperbacks in the 1970s, including a Robert E. Howard title (Black Vulmea’s Vengeance), several Talbot Mundy reprints, and a trio of stunning covers for a Weird Tales paperback revival edited by the late great Lin Carter. Barber was a prolific fantasy and science fiction painter in the 70s and very early 80s, with credits on a wide range of paperback titles and magazines like Galileo and Amazing Science Fiction.
What you might not know is that Barber has also written a book of his own. Described as semi-autobiographical, What the F*** Was That All About? The Story of a Warrior's Journey Home is about a soldier returning home from a distant desert war with some heavy duty scars under the surface.
What the F*** was That All About? is available on Amazon (in print or as a Kindle book) at Amazon.com/dp/1970155019/ or from the publisher at A15publishing.com/all-titles.
Tom recently had to beat a retreat from the small art studio that stands apart from his house, due to the cold New Hampshire weather (oil paints and freezing temperatures don't mix well, it seems). So if you're looking for a compelling read about a guy made it through to the other side of trauma and addiction, and would like to support a talented artist who did great work at the heyday of sword-and-sorcery (and is still doing good work), consider picking up a copy. It's also got some nice black-and-white interior art, by Tom, natch.
Tom has painted much more than just sword-and-sorcery and science fiction. The painting above is one of his best, and resides on permanent display at the Vet Center in White River Junction, Vermont. In my opinion it captures the spirit of what this book is all about: Soldiers extending a helping hand to their buddies who have fallen on hard times.
What follows is an essay at the end of What the F*** Was That All About? I'm including it here with Tom's permission.
The story behind the painting
Part one
Shortly after I slammed into the world of sobriety, the idea for the Vietnam painting slammed into me. The energy that came with it was so strong I stopped talking, my vision blurred, and the hair on my arms stood up. In that instant, I saw the completed painting in my mind.
But I didn’t go near it for over a year. Dark memories from my time as a Vietnam-era army medic. Then with the encouragement of a friend, I finally put it on canvas (1988).
Not having my own studio at the time, I painted it in several different locations. One of those places was in the attic of a friend’s house. There was an old set of encyclopedias stored away up there that I liked to browse through when I wasn’t painting. It was during that time I had a very special dream.
I dreamt I was sitting on the edge of my bed looking at a flower in a glass of water on the bedside table. I picked up the glass to look at the flower more closely, when a very distinct voice behind my left ear said, “Yeah, but it’s dead.”
It was then I realized the flower was starting to wilt. So, I put the glass back on the table and woke up.
Turned on the light (about 3 A.M.) and picked up a book lying on the bed beside me. I opened it at random and my eyes fell on the following lines.
VEDANTA for the Western World
“Each successive age needs a new and characteristic presentation of the truths of religion. For these presentations, once they have been spoken or written down, are like cut flowers: they slowly begin to shrivel, they become dry and dead. Men often treasure dead flowers, for the memory which clings to them, and this is very natural: but one must not forget they are dead. Those who cling too devotedly to the dead flowers, to the letter of the law, lose consciousness of its undying spirit.”
At the same time as this dream, one of the articles I came across in the old encyclopedia stated that love of fellow man is one of the highest goals man can aim for. It’s also the spirit of the painting given to me.
* * *
He was actively planning his own suicide when he saw the painting on a poster advertising the local Vet Center (readjustment counseling). When I met him, he was back from the brink and doing fine. He said the painting brought him in, and he got the help he needed.
Part two
Plato said only the dead have seen the end of war. Great. So now what do we do?
Science speaks of energy. Religion speaks of spirit. They both agree we came from this ethereal world. But when we look around, we find ourselves in a free-fire zone of one harsh reality.
Stories vary as to why we forget where we came from. But universal teachings agree, when we’re ready, we return. So, it’s up to us as individuals to rise above the storm, head back, and help others along the way . . . if they want help. Some don’t.
Pressed for time? Not to worry. When the Buddha attained enlightenment, he remembered thousands of his previous lives.
And where do we rise to? Ancient wisdom speaks of higher planes of existence. Quantum physics talks of parallel universes. Christ said his Father’s house has a whole bunch of rooms in it. Whatever is going on, it sounds like there’s plenty of room for all of us.
And each one of has what it takes to get there. “. . . all things are possible to him that believeth.” (Mark 9:23). All things add up to be a lot of things.
Lock and load.
As far as that ethereal world we came from in the first place? It’s a place many philosophies have referred to as ‘home’. The inspiration for the Vietnam painting was just a reminder of that place.
And the voice behind my left ear? Just keeping the phones line open so the message gets through.
It did.
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